Last night I dreamt of everyone I needed to forgive

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By Aine Herlihy

Recorded by author

This morning, I woke agitated. 
A hot kernel, popping inside me.

As I readied myself for the day ahead,
slowly, their faces began to surface.

Pouring spoiled milk into a bowl, my mother.
Slicing stale bread with a blunt knife, my father.
Steadily closing the back door, and locking it, an old friend.

With each face, an extra annoyance.
Old memories, souring inside me,
bitter in my mouth like metal.

By mid-afternoon, weary with an anger
I could no longer wrestle,
a burst of purple hyacinths
outside my window,
exploding against the campus grey,
caused me to pause.
And buried deep amongst their faces,
I remembered one final one.

This one being the hardest to acknowledge.

Over, and over, and over.
A thousand times today.
I am sorry. I am trying my best.
I forgive, me.

Recorded by Carmen Rumbaut

Aine Herlihy is a poet from the South West of Ireland and works as a Clinical Psychologist. Over the years she has published poems with various journals. Through her work, she is particularly interested in exploring how poetry helps us heal and how it helps us to make sense of our experiences, which in turn, facilitates a better relationship with ourselves, each other and our precious planet.

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